Bert's Extra-Junky Web Pages

	FOOD AND BUG INFO	Select this choice for good stuff on gourmet dining, fine poetry, and pest control!
	BEGGING ADVICE	Choose here to learn all there is to know on starting a career in begging!
	ENGLISH LESSONS	Pick here to learn proper English in just 10 seconds!
	FRENCH LESSONS	Select here to learn the French language in 30 seconds!
	DINOSAURS	See some mean dinosaurs!
	THE ZOO	Choose here if you need a new mouse, pig, or seal.
	THE SIMPSONS	Pick here to see ascii art of the Simpsons (the cartoon, not O.J.'s family!).
	THE EARTH	See the best map of the world. Created by me!
	USA MAP	See a text map of the USA and other areas.
	BERT	Select here to see who is Bert and others.
	FREQUENCY GUIDE	Choose here for a guide if you own a frequency scanner.
	SMILEY DICTIONARY	See an extensive listing of the Smiley Dictionary.
	COMPUTER COMMANDS	Pick here for a useful listing of some basic DOS, Unix, and VMS commands.
	MIDI MUSIC	Select here for many midi music files to play or download.
	FRAMES	Choose here for multiple junk at once. Your browser must support frames to view this (most all do). You should see nine junky pages at one time, so this may take a while to load.
	EXTERNAL LINKS	Pick here if for some illogical reason you don't like Bert's Extra-Junky Web Pages. You'll see a menu of some other famous links, although sticking around here is obviously better.
	MORE JUNK	Select here for more Junky Page choices!

THE MENU OF JUNK